A Life of Service

I’ve been in the Air Force for more than 9 years now and it wasn’t until just recently that I’ve felt “military”.  Last month I volunteered to work on the B-17 display at Barksdale.  I had worked on it before but that day I went out in uniform for a few hours, and something about the task, running the guard rail rope around the display, and the WWII era music playing over the loud speaker, I felt a definite connection to my heritage.

On our way here I looked around.  I saw men and women from around the Air Force coming together to get a job done.  It was the first time I really felt that camaraderie that you see in those war movies.  The coolest part of the trip though was our stop in one Eastern European country.  We were several hours into our trip.  We landed in a small little airport and were bussed off the tarmac.  As several hundred of us flooded the shops and waiting areas, we were met with odd looks from men and women who looked like they were out of a movie.  We were all spread out throughout the terminal anxiously waiting the last leg of our trip, and some rest.  When the word came, we all rose and headed for the gate.  The sight of all of us uniformed personnel must have stirred something because suddenly someone started the “slow clap” which built until the entire terminal was applauding we American servicemen headed to war.  It was one of many surreal moments I’ve had on this deployment.

The other day I attended a Fallen Warrior ceremony.  I piled into a hot bus full of other service members.  We were hauled out to the flight line where we all stood around and waited for direction.  We were given instructions and when told, formed up behind a C-17.  I somehow ended up in the front of the detail.  When ordered, we rendered a slow, ceremonial solute.  I stood there shoulder to shoulder with men and women from all different branches, officer and enlisted alike, as the flag draped casket of a fallen soldier passed in front of me and into a truck then on to another plane for his final trip home to his family.  It was an event that I’m glad I attended but I probably won’t be attending any more, and unfortunately there will be more.  Others I’ve spoken to said they will not go at all but I think I owed it to “them” to be there once.  Pay my respects and know that this is real and what we’re doing here matters.

It's a Boy!

So I’m a dad again, this time the old fashioned way.  I got to watch (almost) the whole process via Skype so it was like I was there, only less messy.  All in all it went how I thought it would and now we have a cute little boy who’s all small and wrinkly. 

Skype was annoying me.  First when I finally was able to get on, which took some work, Skype decided then was the best time to shut down and install an update.  So I sit around for a painful 10 mins, that I used for some reflective prayer, and finally get in.  Then the “fun” started.  Gabe was very helpful and got the camera and some speakers into the bedroom so I could be apart as much as possible.  Holly was squirming and grunting and yelling and all I could do was sit there very antsy and in anguish.  I wanted so badly to be there and take the pain on for her, or at least squeeze her hand while she went through it.  When the little guy started coming, there was a head, then Skype died on me!  The people in the other room must have been very confused when I started yelling at the computer.  After what seem like 30 mins, which was probably only about 2, I got back in and I hear a crying baby.  Then I kept asking, “What is it” because I missed that part.  After about 12 tries I finally found out it was a boy!

Right after I was high on life and went back to work to share the good news but last night I got a bit depressed.  I let myself have a night of being lethargic and melancholy.  Only one night though.  Any more and it could really make this trip drag out.  So now I’m better this morning.  I have a cute little baby and a beautiful wife so life is good.  Speaking of my beautiful wife, she really did look quite stunning right after the little guy was out and she was holding him.  Of course it could be that I haven’t seen a woman in 6 weeks, but I think it’s the former.

Deployment Dialog - Day 45

When I talk to people back home, I’m asked, “What’s going on”, “What have you been up to”.  I thought I’d give a breakdown of my oh so exciting day.

0500 Wake up, shower, get ready for work

0530 Eat breakfast, usually a couple of fried egg sandwiches and orange juice

0600 Head to work, either ride bike or take the shuttle

0630 – 1830 Work keeping the network up and running

1830 Eat dinner

1900 Study for TSgt

2000 Computer time, games, movie, Skype

2200 Bed, read

2300 Sleep and get ready to do all again

It’s a good little routine and it keeps me busy which make the days go by faster.  There's also church, PT, and Margarita Monday with the shop thrown in there but it's still pretty routine.  My down day takes a bit of thinking but it’s usually restful.  All in all it’s been a good tour.  In a week I’ll be about 25% of the way done, not that I’m counting.

Deployment Dialog -Day 2

Ok, first things first. The reason I don’t update more often is because I have a habit of thinking out every entry and then it’s too overwhelming to actually put down on the proverbial paper. So I’m going to just type and will probably end up rambling a bit but what ever.
So I’m “deployed”. Thus far I’ve made it as far as Norfolk. Hopefully I’ll leave tomorrow and make it there Sat.

Wed’s flights were good. The one out of Shreveport was short and crammed. Out of Dallas I got bumped, to first class. I felt bad for those not up there with me but for the first time in my career I felt a little…deserving?...of the “Thank you for your service” from the little old ladies as they walked by. That was until my seatmate sat down. An Air Force Reserve Lt Col who had be deployed four times to places like Baghdad and Kandahar since 9/11 and when I told her that I was going to Qatar she replied with, “Oh yeah that’s nice. We always wanted to stop there and get a massage on our way out of Iraq”…I wanted to say, ”Thank you for your service”.  Of course all of this was discussed over our garden salads with feta cheese and Greek olives topped with jumbo shrimp, our baked peta chips with humus, a couple of glasses of chardonnay and a warm cranberry nut cookie for dessert.  Thank you American Tax Payers.

I’m coming up with a list of things that I want to do while deployed in order to make the most of it and to help pass the time. So far,

1) I want to write in my blogs more about my time there and other things going on.
2) I want to get on a worship team playing drums
3) I want to be engrossed in my work and give a lot more effort than I have been back home. At least here, I hope, I’ll feel like I’m contributing something.
4) I want to get down to about 165 lbs. That’s ~35 lbs to lose. Depending on my schedule when I get there I’m going to try to go to the gym twice a day, once before shift and once after.

The list is still in progress but I’m hoping that I’ll stay busy enough to make the time fly by and 6 months will be over in no time.

Workin' for the Weekend

This past weekend Holly had her dula training in Marshall, TX. That meant I was a single parent for a couple of days. I was a little worried how things would go with a potty training 18 month old. I knew Xander would be fine but Holly usually takes care of the "baby" things.


All in all it went well. No major incidents. Lorelei took her diaper off Friday night a peed in the bed, but beyond that no accidents. It was a good weekend and I think the kids and I got to bond a little.

In some ways, I'm envious of my brother Jon. He, through a series of events, is now a stay at home dad. I think I would enjoy staying home, taking care of the kids. Since I'm the more organized of the adults, I would clean and organize the house and MAINTAIN it. I would plan and cook meals. It seems like a lot of fun. I whole lot better than my job anyway!

Out Of The Woodwork

Like I stated back when I first started this blog, I always thought that this “commune” or homestead project or whatever you want to call it idea was always a bit out there.  Until a couple of years ago, I didn’t know anyone who was even interested in growing vegetables much less moving to the middle of nowhere a living a simpler lifestyle.  I’d always posed the question to friends, “Hey do you want to come and join our oddball scheme?” to which most would chuckle and say, “surrrrre” assuming that either it would never happen or when it did they could back out.  I really believed that Holly, the kids and I would be living out in the hills of Tennessee somewhere by ourselves because no one else was a crazy as we are to uproot our family and move to a foreign land.

Well the good news is that there are other crazies out there.  It really took me by surprise when Gary called me and asked, “How serious are you about this Commune thing”.  We’re serious.  We’re getting more and more serious every day.  Every time I start to think about how we’ll leave this house one day I long for a since of history in my home.  Every time I think about what we are doing with a quarter acre I think about what I could do with 10, 20, 100 acres.  When I hear about crime, about the failures of public schools, the influence of media, I think about a place where I can raise my children with values and around people of my choosing.  I want to go, NOW!

But like I said, very few people were willing do to this same thing, right?  The more we tell people about our dreams, the more like-minded people we find.  Gary really wasn’t a stretch, but my Mom wanting to join us was.  My friend Haley and her husband want to come and are even raising chickens and pigs (so jealous!).  Friends from at least 5 different states have expressed serious intrestest in joining us (though I have to say I’m still on the skeptical side).  Even beyond that, we’re finding people with the same dream.  Out of the blue, Holly “met” a family living near us who is persuing the same plan of one day homesteading and is actually further along than us.  I talk to people at work that I’ve known for years and they tell me about their chickens, their life growing up on the farm, their gardens and their desire to live more simply.  I’m just amazed at how many people in my generation are actually looking back at the way our forefathers lived and are envious.  I had no idea that we were not alone.

Quote of the Week

"I recollected that her eye excelled in brightness, that of any other animal, and that she has no eye-lids—She may therefore be esteemed an emblem of vigilance.—She never begins an attack, nor, when once engaged, ever surrenders: She is therefore an emblem of magnanimity and true courage.—As if anxious to prevent all pretensions of quarreling with her, the weapons with which nature has furnished her, she conceals in the roof of her mouth, so that, to those who are unacquainted with her, she appears to be a most defenseless animal; and even when those weapons are shewn and extended for her defense, they appear weak and contemptible; but their wounds however small, are decisive and fatal:—Conscious of this, she never wounds till she has generously given notice, even to her enemy, and cautioned him against the danger of treading on her.—Was I wrong, Sir, in thinking this a strong picture of the temper and conduct of America?"

--American Guesser, AKA Benjamin Franklin; Suggesting that the rattlesnack was a good symbol for the American spirit

What’s Wrong with This Country?!

The United States used to be a beacon of hope for those around the world.  We used to be a refuge for those in other lands facing hardships because we were a free society and were based on a very solid, clear-cut set of principles.  I mean country after country has modeled their own government after ours.  Now with the introduction of lawyers and politicians those principles are thrown out for each one’s subversive agenda.  And the problem is that We, the American people, don’t know enough and/or don’t care enough to call the Powers-That-Be on it when they try to do something that’s obviously morally or legally wrong!  Let me give you a few examples that I’ve seen.

A few years back I was in a Political Studies online class.  Before the class even started, there was an open discussion between another student and myself about the roles of government.  My statement was, “I’m sick of judges with an agenda out there making laws as they want.  That’s Congresses’ job to make laws, it judges’ to interpret them.”  At this point the teacher jumped in and posted something to the effect of, “I’m so glad you’re in this class Chris, I think you’ll learn a lot” thus implying I was in the wrong!  Now, I’m not a (third-rate) “professor” at a (crap) (online) “university”, but I’m fairly certain that I learned, IN MIDDLE SCHOOL, the way that government was “supposed” to work.

I recently came upon a story about a publishing company that has begun to include a disclaimer on the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence.  The disclaimer stated:

“This book is a product of its time and does not reflect the same values as it would if it were written today.  Parents might wish to discuss with their children how views on race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, and interpersonal relations have changed since this book was written before allowing them to read this classic work."

I’m sorry, what?!  While this is likely a blanket statement put on all historical works, what moron decided that it was appropriate to apply this to our founding documents?  Though reading the first line, I can’t say I totally disagree.  If it were written today then I guarantee that today’s values would be different.  Maybe what parents should discuss with their children is how screwed up today’s “values” are and that we need to get right and go back to the views written in this “classic work”?

Finally, while there may be the occasional loon out there with misguided beliefs, our elected officials know and always follow the letter of the law, right.  I mean for instance, the President of the United States wouldn’t just be out there say, declaring war on another country without Congressional approval, passing illegal health care laws requiring someone to pay an illegal fine for not buying into a potentially disastrous system, or openly search for ways to circumvent written laws and procedures, would he?

“The Obama administration has been holding behind-the-scenes talks to determine whether the Department of Homeland Security can unilaterally grant legal status on a mass basis to illegal immigrants, a former Bush administration official who spoke with at least three people involved in those talks told FoxNews.com.”

“"The administration at the very minimum is studying legal ways to legalize people without having to go through any congressional debate about it," the source said, calling the senators' claim credible.”

Awesome. 

My belief is that a large part of this stems from a total lack of understanding or the desire to understand and know our history.  Americans are very much in the here and now, getting their new iPhone 6G and keeping up with what Dumb and Dumber are doing on whatever trash is passing as television these days.  I get teased about my love of the History Channel (not that it’s any better.  Ancient Aliens?  Ice Road Truckers.  Really?!) but as a student of history, I can see where we’ve been, who we’ve had to fight against and have a very good idea of where we are likely headed.  I have a quote myself that I’d like to share.

“When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.”

I think I heard that on The Hills or OC or something.  My question is simply this; Is it “necessary” once again?

The Verdict

The family is back (YAY!) and so I thought it would be fair to do an assessment of how I spent my “man time” while they were gone.  Let me first preface my review by saying that took all of last week off.  The two weeks prior were very stressful so I wanted the vacation plus I took the opportunity to use that time to get some extra work done around the house.

As I mentioned previously I had downloaded the WoW free trial to play while everyone was gone.  I also had a piled list of “to dos”, some of which have been haunting me for a year now.  I admit that I was a little afraid in the back of my mind that I would get engrossed in playing games and general slacking off that I wouldn’t get anything done.  However, here is my list of “accomplishments”, both productive and not, for my week:

·         Tarred and patched potential holes in the roof, preventing leaks

·         After we had the flood last year and put tile in, the floor was too high for the door to our laundry room preventing its use.  Cut ½ off the bottom and hung it.

·         Hung and powered oven hood that’s been sitting in the garage for a year

·         Bought, cut, and installed backsplash

·         Installed utensil rack above stove

·         Installed carpet terminator at the point where it meets the tile (also a year over due)

·         Did all of the laundry in the house, folded it and put it in its appropriate location

·         Washed all of the dishes and maintained the cleanliness

·         Bought, cooked and ate seafood

·         Grilled ribs for the first time

·         Bought shelving unit for the garage, bought air tight tubs of varying sizes, put all of the various bulk goods sitting in bags throughout the house into the tubs, labeled them accordingly and stacked them neatly and easily accessible on the shelves

·         Cleared, consolidated and reorganized spice shelf and pantry.  Labeled pantry

·         Watched 5 or 6 “Laser Movies” (aka Man movies) that Holly would never watch with me

·         Made level 27 with my character on WoW

·         Watched the entire first season of Spartacus (NOT family friendly btw)

·         Mowed the yard and began to weed-eat before the rains came

·         Ensured the gardens at home and abroad were properly maintained

·         Printed off and entered some of my better photos into a gallery at church

Now granted all of this was done as a single person so my normal responsibilities as a husband and father didn’t “interfere”-so to speak.  Over all I’m quite please with what I was able to accomplish and I really enjoyed the time to unwind from work.  I’m thinking that Holly is so impressed by the work I did that she’ll make the trip a yearly occurrence, not likely though.

Inglorious

This is funny in part because of the subject and also because I just watched Inglorious Bastards last night.  Can you catch the mistakes before the Nazi does? VIDEO HERE

Meaningless, Meaningless, Everything is Meaningless

Some time ago my wife relayed on her blog a revelation I had. I love video game, always have (that’s not the revelation). Since I played Ernie’s Magic game on my dad’s Commodore 286 I’ve loved them. I grew up on Nintendo, moved to Nintendo 64 (Goldeneye is still the best game ever!), then to Playstation and finally settled into computer games. I’m pretty picky about what I play but if I find something I like I will play it forever! I play Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion fairly regularly (5 years old) and I still spin up Starcraft every once in a while (over a decade old). The real Lifesuck is the MMORPG. For those not hip to the lingo, a Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game is like a regular game just on a global scale. It’s a huge world where you interact with game characters as well as real live people who are also playing the game. I call it a Lifesuck because that’s exactly what it has the potential to be. For the average person who gets into it (usually guys) it will consume your every waking hour, either playing or thinking about playing, and several of your sleeping ones too (I really have had dreams about playing World of Warcraft (WoW)). I have spent DAYS of my life (not all at once though) playing these types of games, very often ignoring my duties as a husband and home owner. There are stories of people letting their children starve because they played too much and at least one person died while playing.


So my revelation. I realized why games are so popular to people like me. Beyond the simple fact that it lets weaklings and geeks be heroes on a grand scale, I think there’s more to it. I think it fills the void that would normally be filled by actual accomplishment, i.e. satisfaction from our work. Ecclesiastes 2:24 says, “A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God”. We are supposed produce, accomplish, or complete something however today most jobs are just a mundane passing of time in order to get that check. Really, how much satisfaction can a receptionist get from her daily work of answering phones? Or take my job. Everyday I fix the same problem, or similar one, move the same furniture and fill out the same report, and tomorrow I’ll do it all again. It’s really hard to feel fulfilled by that kind of repetition. So games give you little micro rewards, the next level, next good piece of armor/weapon, a little something to brag about to other unfulfilled people playing along side you. But at the end of the day, what’s the point? You haven’t achieved anything. Your house is still a mess, you’re health is worse off, and your wife is probably mad at you. It’s a series of 1’s and 0’s that don’t care if you’re there or not and if the power goes off at the wrong time all of your “work” is lost to cyberspace for ever. I realized this after the first season of gardening. I got a real since of satisfaction and accomplishment out of my hard work and sweat and at the end of the day I had food on the table to show for it.

So that being said, I still play games though I’ve gotten much better at managing my time and learning the skill of disconnecting myself from them when needed. I prefer to play games that are pausable so that I can get up at a moments notice. I’ve gotten away from the Lifesuck of the MMO, in part because of the reasons mentioned but also because of the added monthly cost for most. That was until I read THIS article in the Simple Dollar (I’ll wait for you to read it). The SD is a financial blog about a guy who was completely upside down in his finances and now turned his life around, makes a living doing what he loves and helps others along the way. He pointed out that if you view gaming as a hobby (which is what it should be) that you partake in for an hour or so a day, it’s relatively inexpensive and fairly relaxing. I hadn’t taken this view point into consideration. If I look at it as my hobby, some guys fish, some guys golf, I slaughter Orcish hordes, then it’s no different. The problem is the time management and getting addicted, which I can do easily I’ve discovered. So as I’m typing this I’m also downloading WoW. But like The SD says, if I play for an hour a day, I’m only paying a few cents, I have a chance to unwind, I can socialize a little, and, if I do it right, I can get my “fix” and disconnect and move on with my life. That’ll just have to be key, if I can pull myself away easily. I know I had difficulty when I played before but that too was in part to my real life friends (vs. the online ones) playing alongside me so there was a bit more peer pressure as well as camaraderie whilst playing that I won’t have this time. Plus, it’ll give me something to pass the time and keep me out of trouble while I’m deployed. I don’t know, I’m thinking of playing next week when Holly and the kids are in New Mexico (in addition to doing some house work too of course). We’ll see. If I realize that it’s just a hobby, it’s not going to give me any lasting satisfaction, there are more important things to do, and not neglect my family I should be alright.

Do You Hum Your Own Theme Song?

My bestest Brofriend, Gary, said that every time he hears R.E.O. Speedwagon’s “Ridin’ the Storm Out” it made him think of our Homestead Project (which is taking the place of “Our Commune” by the way) and that we should use it as our theme song.  Now I have to explain that Gary is kind of an older gentleman (mid-30’s) so his brand of music isn’t what we young hip kids listen to these days.  I’d never heard of the song but I think I saw something about R.E.O. Speedwagon on late night VH1 once.  I looked up the tune on YouTube and Googled the lyrics and he is right about the song.  It’s simple but so is the outlook.  Below is the song and the lyrics.  Let us know what you think.

Riding the storm out

Waiting for the thaw out

On a full moon night in the

Rocky Mountain winter

My wine bottle's low

Watching for the snow

I've been thinking about what

I've been missing in the city

{Refrain}

And I'm not missing a thing

Watching the full moon crossing the range

Riding the storm out (4x)

My lady's beside me

She's there to guide me

She says that alone we've finally

Found our home

The wind outside is frightening

But it's kinder than the lightning life in the city

It's a hard life to live

But it gives back what you give

Happy Anniversary!

Well today is Holly and my 6^th anniversary.  We aren’t too big into celebrating Halmark holidays but I just wanted to take a moment to tell you, dear, how much I love you and know that you are the best thing that God had ever brought into my life.  You have quite literally changed my life and my outlook on it, for the better, in the short time we’ve known each other.  Circumstances never seem to work out like we plan but I love the fact you are willing to ride next to me on life's rollercoaster and hold my hand on the scary parts.  You are a wonderful mother, baker, wife, free-thinker, God-fearer, hard worker and friend.  Thank you for exulting my strengths and for forgiving my many faults.  I love being with you every day just a little more and can’t wait until forever. 

Hypothetically Speaking – Church Membership: Response

This is my response to the hypothetical question posed HERE.


Most responses to this question fall somewhere around the lines of “Love the sinner, hate the sin” which is very true, but, there are other factors to consider. These are not non-believers, they are not new Christians, this was not a onetime failing and they are not repentant. They are professing believers, living in open/semi-open sin and, as parents, have influence over children and, as members, influence in church matters.

As Christians we are held to a higher standard. We are supposed to be in the World, not of it.  Meaning you can be a biker, emo, a jock, or a nerd but if you’re giving into the sins of those realms then you are misrepresenting what it means to be a Christian.

A Christian is a direct representation of Christ and what He stands for. People are always looking at us in a different light. I compare it to being in the military. I, as a Noncommissioned Officer in the United States Air Force, am a direct representation of the US Military when at home and a representation of the United States as a whole while abroad. Every action I do is monitored by those on the “outside”. Typically there is a great deal of admiration but if I did anything to bring shame, it’s not just on me, it’s on everything I represent. We saw this somewhat while in Portugal. The opinions of Americans had soured for some of the locals because of the actions of a few unruly, rude, or inconsiderate Airmen.

So, how do we handle this couple? My first action would be to suspend their church membership. It’s not necessarily biblical, but neither is membership in the first place. Suspending them from the membership prevents them from voting and teaching (in most churches) and from acting as representatives of that church. From a biblical perspective, Gary hit the nail on the head. Matthew 18:15-20 gives us the play by play for the procedure to confront a person, bring to light their sin, and have them removed from the body if necessary, for their good and the good of the church. In 1 Corinthians 5:1-13, Paul goes off on the church because they not only had sexual immorality amongst them, they were proud of it! In the chapter he goes on to explain that allowing sin to fester in the body is like bad yeast, it works its way through the whole loaf of bread and spoils it. He also states that we should, “hand this man over to Satan” meaning expel him from the church, “so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord”. Removing this unrepentant couple from the body would have the effect (hopefully) of convicting them to change their ways.

Now we have a problem. The scenario I gave was pretty cut and dry, one we could all agree on. But what about another sin? What if it was a person guilty of habitual lying? Of excessive drinking? Taking the Lords name? What if it was greed? Lust? Hate? Jealousy? Gossiping? The Bible doesn’t give us a “line” of what’s acceptable and what’s not and we’ve all heard that a sin is the same to God no matter how big or small we see it. When we look at it in that light then we’re left with either a church full of sinners or a totally empty one. I think we have to look at it as we are all sinners in some area but what sins are causing, or has the potential to cause, others to sin as well?

Hypothetically Speaking – Church Membership

Hypothetically Speaking is a periodic series designed to get reader to response to theoretical situations in religion, politics, and life.  Your viewpoints are requested and appreciated.  I will leave the discussion open for debate for a couple of days after which I will throw my two cents in.  Enjoy!

I’ve posed this question to a few friends before but I’m looking for wider readership.  Hypothetically speaking, say there are two people, a man and a women, both in their late 30’s, divorced and both with children.  They are both members of your church.  These two start to date and it becomes public knowledge that they are sleeping together and have actually moved in with each other.  They may or may not be discrete about it in public and with the children but the kids know that their parent and this other person are sleeping in the same room at home.

What, biblically speaking, should be the church’s role in this situation?  Does it have a right/responsibility to take an action?

Four in the Fire

Isn't it cool when the pastor seemingly gears the sermon to you and your needs?  Sunday's was about Rack, Shack and Benny when the king ordered everyone to bow down during the music.  Of course we all know the story; they refused to do it because they were obeying God's commands and in the end the king tossed them into the fire.  Instead of burning up though, a fourth figure appeared in the fire with them and they came out unscathed, giving glory to God.  The moral of the story, and sermon, was that they did what God asked, even though the outcome was uncertain.
We had kind of been just floating along the last few years.  Life was good and though it wasn't perfect, there wasn't much adversity either.  Every since we've started to take an stance of "how would God want us to do this?" and working toward our Homestead, things have been happening.  As many of you know, Holly and I have been trying to have a baby for about four and a half years now.  The Lord has finally blessed us with a pregnancy! Holly's due in early Dec.  Very exciting stuff.  Since then though it feels like Satan is trying to beat us down.  First physically, a couple of weeks ago I fell and dislocated my shoulder.  God made a quick recovery for me.  The he tried stress, stress at work and at home.  God has given peace an understanding.  Now Satan is trying a new tactic.  I've been in the AF for 9 years now and have never been sent anywhere longer than a month.  Now that we're pregnant I find out that I'm scheduled for deployment in Oct.  The location is not bad and if timed differently I wouldn't have much problem with going.  I just don't want to be in another country while my wife is going through her first birthing.
I've just given this whole thing over to God.  There is little I can do about it and I've seen what little good my attempts do versus God's attempts.  I know that no matter where I am in Dec, it will be because of God that I'm there and nothing that I nor anyone else on this earth can do will change that.  I'm trusting that there will be a Fourth along with me in my fire.

Backing Off

I’ve been posting every day since I started this blog and, while I haven’t run out of things to talk about, yet, I think I’m over doing it a little and bombarding yous guys (ya’ll for you southerners). So I’m going to slow down my rants a little and only post every other day, probably even days. It’ll give everyone who’s interested a chance to read when they get the opportunity and also allow me more time with the fam. Try to contain your sadness.

Presidental Speech

This past weekend the President gave a speech to the graduates of Hampton University. In it, he made the following comment:

And meanwhile, you're coming of age in a 24/7 media environment that bombards us with all kinds of content and exposes us to all kinds of argument....And with iPods and iPads; and Xboxes and PlayStations...information becomes a distraction, a diversion, a form of entertainment, rather than a tool of empowerment, rather than the means of emancipation.

I don't have a history of agreeing with the Pres but he makes a valid point. The point is also made in the book Better Off, by Eric Brende. Technology is very good and helpful, as long as it is actually helpful. What I mean is there comes a point where the cost of using a technology out weighs the benefit of it.

Take Facebook for example. It's great that I can keep up with all of my friends and family from around the world, see their kids and know what's going on with their lives. However that's also how I announced our pregnancy so I missed out on the initial excitement everyone else had. There is nationwide 3G, fastest, widest, etc. on our phones but we’ve also become slaves to them. Imagine going anywhere and not taking your cell phone with you, or only owning a landline. Ridiculous!

Where do we draw the line? Most (non-Amish) people would agree that the automobile is a good technology but do we need all the bells and whistles? On our family vacation we can get to our destination in a couple of hours instead of a couple of days but if our children spend that whole time nose down text messaging on a cell or eyes glued to a DVD player, aren’t they missing some of the beauty of the scenery and the, admittedly forced, interation with the family?

I’m trying to employ this thinking when buying. For instance I have a list of things that I want to get one day. One is a grind stone for sharpening axes and knives. I don’t have one, there really isn’t a reasonable substitution, and it’s a practical, useful tool. However, another thing is a log splitter for firewood. It saves time and energy but I, and eventually my children, am quite capable of swinging an axe and I would lose the workout in the cool outdoors and the feeling of accomplishment when done.

We’re planning on getting Droids when our plan allows at the end of the year but I’m getting it for the tools it provides, the GPS and ability to research if what I’m about to buy is a good deal or not, not to update my Twitter status (or my blog for that matter). We as Americans have gotten used to the here, now, faster when what we really need to is slow down, stop, and smell the proverbial roses.

What Are You Guys Thinking?!

When I first started thinking of my Chazown I thought that we’d settle on an acre or two. Eventually I upped it to about 5 acres and maybe as much as 10 but never thought seriously about more than that. What’s the point? I’m not going to be farming for anyone else but our family so why have that land just sitting there?

When Gary called me and said that he was interested in actually going through with the Homestead Project, he told me he wanted to look for something larger, like 600 acres! I thought, “What in the world are we going to do with that!” Even if we parceled that out evenly with ten families that’s still 60 acres, way more than we need. But his point is simple.

Hypothetically, say we get six families who are serious about uprooting themselves now and moving out to the middle of nowhere giving the Deerings 100 acres, if split evenly. My brother and family want to join us only can’t right at the moment but in ten years decide they can. We can sell them, say 20 acres. Soon after my Mom wants to move too but only wants a house and a yard. Sell an acre. You get the idea. Part of that  whole amount too would be designated for community use. Maybe have a park of some kind and a meeting hall and/or a restaurant.

Ideally speaking, I would love to have my family and friends from all over move to where ever we end up, currently I’m thinking of people from FL, TX, KS, LA and NM. That’s not even to mention the people that Gary has in mind. Then you add on the people we haven’t talked to yet. Then there is the friends of friends who hear about it and want to join. That acreage can be eaten up pretty quickly. Granted once some of us move to an area we can be on the look out for acquiring more land nearby but still.

So we’re thinking a large plot of land, which means a large sum of money. We’re talking potentially in the millions and that’s not even counting a house for every family. That thought alone is enough to scare some people off. I’m not worried because the God Plan is in play.

So what about the When? Well that too is still up in the air. Ideally speaking, all of the cogs fell into place and we won the land lotto or something, we’re thinking five years. More realistically it’ll probably be closer to ten years when we’re all ready to make the leap forward. I’m not able to retire for another 11 years at the earliest but Holly and I have spoken and made the decision that if God were to present our group with an opportunity to invest in some land, we would jump on it regardless of if we were able to move there or not yet. Who are we to question the Almighty?

Right now we’re still in the recruiting stage. We’ve begun the narrowing process for tracking down what state we want based on laws and such. I’m working on a spreadsheet that will help us look at the pros and cons of each state and a mutual friend of ours has an interesting prospect that I’ll elaborate on later. Right now we are just trusting in the Lord that He will provide what we want, whether we know we want it or not yet.

Words Matter

In a recent rant, my friend Gary went off about the usage of words in the English language. One of his friends posted this in his comments and I thought it was very funny. Oh what our world is coming to.   It's funny because it's true.

Quote of the Week

"Be careful how you live, not as fools but as those who are wise.  Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days.  Don't act thoughtlessly, but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do".

-Paul, Letter to the Ephesians, 5:15-17 (NLT)

My Weekly Homecoming

It’s hard being so far away from family, especially on holidays. I was giving friends a hard time because they were skipping out on lunch with us to go and see family for Mother’s Day. “What’s the big deal” I said, “it’s just a made up holiday”, to which they just shrugged and agreed. But later I was thinking what I would be doing if I lived within driving distance of our family. I’d be going to see my mom. Or better yet, with our homestead plans, we’ll pick her up and bring her to our house for a big family lunch. I’m a little jealous of my friends now.


Like I said, it’s hard. My family and I haven’t always been the closest but we’re family and I need that just like everyone. I’ve been out of the house now going on 9 years and it wasn’t until we moved here, and saw everyone returning home for the traditional gatherings, that I really felt homesick for that tradition.

No church is perfect and any one that tells you they are is lying in addition to who knows what else. Traveling around has given me some perspective into this as I’ve attended countless different churches over the years and I’ve seen all sorts of flaws. When we moved to Shreveport we were strangers in a strange land. Coming from a place where some of my closet friends were literally a stones throw a way to a place where we didn’t know a soul was very hard on me. We tried our current church, didn’t quite find a fit, and went to a different one. We spent a year or so there but certain ways that they handled things didn’t sit right with us and we ended up going back to Church at Red River. What got us in the door was an invitation but what kept us there were the people. Everyone welcomed us with hugs and hand shakes though they barley knew us. The pastor’s wife remembered our names and faces even though we had only met her a hand full of times over a year prior. They were so real! When they asked “How are you” they meant it.

I play the drums on Friday nights for a group called Celebrate Recovery. It’s kind of like a Christ centered AA and is for people with “hurts, habits and hang ups”. These are people who have been around the block. But they are the nicest warmest people you’ve ever met. Some of them if you met them in a dark ally you’d get a little nervous but those are the same ones that’ll give you the big bear hug when they greet you. Admittedly the lure of band playing, free hot home cooked meal, free child care, and a biblical lesson help keep us coming back but the people are a big part too.

I realized how much we’re apart of this group this past Sunday. I had hurt my arm and couldn’t play two weeks ago and last week I had plans and couldn’t play, plus I needed the extra healing time. But Sunday morning people were coming out of the woodwork to greet me, ask about my arm, and to tell me how much they missed my playing. It was really wonderful to know that I was so beloved by these people. To know that my family and I have had such an impact on their lives and that they have had one on ours. I get a homecoming every week even though I’m technically 1,000 miles from home. God provides again.

I Need A Journal

I have for sometime wanted a notepad of some sort that I could carry around with me. I’ve often heard quotes in church or where ever that and wanted to jot them down to remember later but either I've not had something to write on or have lost the scrap of paper that I did have.


This past weekend the desire was even more prevalent when every five minutes something was popping into my head that I wanted to blog about or just remember. I have the worst memory when it comes to things like that so jotting them down really helps.

I think I want to get a journal of some kind. I’ll just have to commit to carrying it around with me everywhere (I’m going to get bulky with this and my camera strapped to my back). I’m thinking I want to get a nice looking, leather-ish journal, similar to the one the teacher carries in Blue Car (terrible movie, don’t see it). Now granted the guy never wrote in it and was a pedophile, but I liked his notebook.

I did a little research and I think I like this one:
















It’s nice looking, discreet, durable, and cheap enough. But since I rarely buy anything for myself, I guess I’ll have to wait until my anniversary to see if I can get it *wink*.

Coming Full Circle

As I mentioned before, the only person in my family who's expressed an interest so far in our little adventure is my mother. She seemed completely excited to get to a place where we work the land, live simply, and enjoy the quite slow country life.


Most of my friends probably don’t know this but my mother is a farmer’s daughter. She grew up on a farm in rural Wisconsin where her father raised cattle and crops. What surprised me was that since she’s left the farm she’s worked very hard to improve her surroundings and acquire the things she never had growing up. She’s told me stories about how her toys used to be shoes that she pretended were the cattle going into the barn for milking. She would use the salt and pepper shakers as her bride and groom dolls. And while I think there is a fair amount of “back in my day” syndrome going on, farmers aren’t exactly known for living the high life.

Growing up I was spoiled, I can admit that now. My mom is more or less a self made woman and she worked her butt off to provide everything my brother, sister and I ever needed and almost everything we wanted. Her love languages are Acts of Service and Gifts (neither of which are mine by the way) which meant she did most everything for us and provided us with all sorts of things. This in turn never allowed me to learn the value of hard work or the cost of a dollar. Don’t get me wrong, I’m in no way faulting my mother. She was only trying her best to express her love in the way she knew how and to give us all of the things she never had as a child.

My mom, born in the 50’s, and the women of her generation were told by society that their “highest aspiration was not housewife anymore, it was now bread winner. Public schooling and fast food would take care of the mundane chores. Go out and make something of yourself!” My mom, regardless of what she was told, also was as single mother from my tenth year on so of course that played a big part too.

Now that I’m older though and raising kids of my own, I don’t want them to have everything. Kids are spoiled rotten. I’m not just giving my own “back in my day” story here. I see no reason a ten year old should have their own 42” TV, Playstation 3/Xbox/Wii, computer and cell phone. I watch how kids act in public and they get away with talking back, disobeying, and acting foolish with Mom sitting in her chair counting “1, 2, 2 and a half…”. That’s not what God meant when he said, “Train up a child”. I would presume that there are very few children who have any chores beyond “clean up your room” and then they get paid for it.

I see my job as a parent to make viable adults of my children. Not spoiled whinny, nanny state-dependant drains on society. If you teach you kids that “even though you didn’t finish your vegetables like I asked, even after counting to three, I’ll still give you dessert” kind of mentality how will they act when they move out into the world?

I’m trying to teach my children the value of a hard days work. We make bread, ice cream, and pizza ourselves and it tastes 100 times better than anything store bought. Xander has his own garden that he (with help) planted, watered, fertilized, and harvested peas and, as we are standing there munching on the sweetest peas you’ve ever had, we talk about the work that went into it. What does a child remember more, a brand new car given to them on their birthday or the beater that they spent months or years scrapping together every dime to save for?

So now, after having a mother who spent much of her life giving her kids the things the farm didn’t have, she has a son who wants more than anything to go and live on a farm and withhold certain things from his children in order to better them. Not only that but she wants join him and his family! We’ve come full circle indeed.

Garden Update - 8 May 2010

So we are currently attempting to grow:
16 tomato plants, almost all heirloom, all different varieties
8 pepper plants, 7 different varieties
2 patches of green beans, one in Xander’s garden, one in the family patch
8 cucumbers
Corn
Radishes
6 melon plants, all heirloom, all different varieties
Basil
Rosemary
Oregano
Raspberries
Cilantro
Strawberries
Onions
Potatoes
Swiss chard
Green onion
Garlic
Arugala
Sage
Asparagus
And who knows what else!

• We have one tomato each on the Yellow Pear, Black Krim, and Superbush
• No strawberries to speak of yet. Strawberry season ended about a week ago :(
• We have peas starting to come in. Almost enough to have a side dish for the family
• We actually planted the asparagus a year or two ago and didn’t even try to keep it going this year. We’ve had several meals with our own asparagus side. It just came up out of no where and was very good.
• We regularly eat the spices and chard with our meals. I will always, no matter where I live, keep oregano and basil growing near by. It’s very cool.

Photo Essay - Spring Planting Festival

http://bestattemptphotography.blogspot.com/Any one who knows me knows I don't go too many places without a camera slung over my shoulder. I’m an amateur shutterbug (I think I hate that term) who aspires to one day make a meager sum from selling my photos. My other blog is a conical of that journey. This past weekend I of course took pictures (though not as many as usual for some reason) and here are some that kind of show what we were up to.

Xander feeding the heirloom sheep some of the good stuff, clover from outside the fence.  Sometimes the grass really is greener.

Of course Lorelei had to follow suit.  That child knows no fear.

This was a common sight.  Family bands singing gospel music or just musicians tinkering about.  It was very surreal.

This is the guy doing the blacksmith demonstrations all weekend.  Here he is sharpening a knife that he just hammered out.  Later I watched him create from scratch, then purchased for $1.00, an iron nail.  Very cool.

Besides plants and foods, which we purchased plenty of both, they also were selling foul.  I wanted very much to take some of these little guys home.  Maybe next time.

This was the only permanantly constructed bathroom.  I thought it was funny.  Door on the end says "No GMOs" meaning Genetically Modified Organism or, in this case, food that has been genetically altered for one reason or another.

Isn't this the weirdest thing?  Everywhere you'd see people dressed like Little House on the Prairie and playing old time hymns.  It was very cool.  The girls show here are some of the ones written about in The Gathering.

The Specifics

The general image I try to present of home on range is great for helping others to envision their own Chazown, but since it’s MY blog, let me describe exactly what I want to have. Now keep in mind that some of these points are higher on my priority scale than others, and we all know how My Plan works out, but there’s nothing wrong with dreaming perfection right?


· The name of the state doesn’t matter so much. I want a state that has no income tax, good benefits for military veterans, and good homeschooling laws.
· I want a piece of land, 5 to 500 acres, that has rich soil good for both plant and animal sustainment and has no history of misuse (over use of chemicals, etc).
· I want to live within driving distance of good sized military base (<100 miles) for getting things like prescriptions.
· I want to live within commuting distance of a large town/small city so that anyone who joins us on our little adventure but is not fortunate enough to be able to retire as early as 38 and collect a check forever, can still find enough work to live on and pay the bills.
· I want to have four seasons.
· I would prefer land that has a historic house on it, 100 years old or so, that we could live in while we build a newer house that will become our home. The old house would then be renovated and used for guests or having parents come live in after retirement.
· The new home would be built with socialization in mind, having big open rooms that flow and of course a great kitchen. There will be a wood burning fireplace in the common area, possibly a wood burning stove for warmth and/or cooking, and the master bedroom will have a gas fireplace.
· There is plenty of forest around to provide firewood for the house and adventures for the children (and me too!).
· We have built, in the yard somewhere, a brick smoker/grill. We have a large greenhouse out there as well.
· Somewhere on the property there is a lake, stream, river, creek, pond, or other body of water for swimming in on hot days.
· We have a very large garden, an acre or more, where we grow every kind of vegetable available to us in that region.
· A ways out there is our orchard where we grow (insert fruit tree here). Near the orchard we also grow berries that keep us fat and happy the year round.
· Over there is our chicken yard where we get the manure for our garden as well as eggs and meat for us to use and sell.
· We grow our own pine trees in different stages and every year we go out and cut one down to bring in for Christmas.
· I think I’ve picked up pipe smoking from Gary and we’ve started to grow our own tobacco.
· We as a family (and community too) make our own bread, cheese, beer, and maybe wine.
· Any produce or other commodity we have extra we sell on the weekend at the farmer’s market or to local restaurants.
· We live near enough to family and old friends that we can walk or bike over to their house, only after calling first of course.
· There is large meeting hall that everyone is free to use and there we play games and have parties all the live long day.
· I was thinking of maybe having a restaurant, open only a few days a week for limited hours, where we as a community could cook and serve the items we produce with our friends. Maybe even do it on a donations only basis, similar to how Bakersville does it. This one’s still up in the air.

These are rather specific specifics, I get that. I’ve learned to be pretty flexible with these types of things. But why can’t I have a dream? The thing I’ve learned is that if I long for something enough, God will provide. It’s just the manner of getting what I want that always seems to differ.

Quote of the Week

“Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it.”
-Mark Twain

Home Again, Home Again…

So we made it back from our odd little adventure. I’m sure I’ll be speaking about all of the observations and intrigues that came to me in later posts. For now I’ll just summarize the narration.

I finally got in to see a base doc for my shoulder on Friday, only after calling at the first minute the sick call lines were opened. When I called the morning after I got hurt and told them what had happened and that the ER had told me I needed to see a specialist ASAP, they originally scheduled me for a visit to see the doctor, a WEEK later. Socialized medicine in action! After I saw the doc, a nice civilian woman whose husband is my dentist and did my surgery a month ago, she put me on quarters for the day. I didn’t really think it was necessary since I could, with mild discomfort, sit at my desk and type, but I didn’t mind the little extra time to get ready.

We left early Saturday morning and headed to Mansfield, MO. It was a ~10 hour drive but wasn’t bad and the kids held up nicely considering. We, as is our custom when traveling, got a book on CD from the library to help pass the time. We got Animal, Vegetable, Miracle which we had listened to before but it was a good one and I thought appropriate for the kind of excursion we were on. I will expound more on the book at a later date. We got to our “Inn”, a place one online reviewer described as “Bates-esque”, about 4 and only checked in before heading to out to Mansfield’s claim to fame, the Laura Ingalls Wilder Home and Museum just a few miles up the road. There we met a long time “friend” of Holly’s and toured the home. When I say met, I mean I, the kids, AND Holly spoke to him for the first time in person that day. I’ll let Holly explain on her blog.

On Sunday we woke up, ate some breakfast in our room and headed out to the festival. I struggle when people ask to explain exactly what this event was. Here is an excerpt from the Baker Creek Heirloom Seed Companies’ website:

Come join us and 6000 others for America’s premier event of seeds, plants, music, culture and the celebration of historic foods.


Enjoy a sense of community with fascinating seed collectors, renowned musicians, national speakers, historic demonstrators, food activists, home schoolers, western re-enactors, organic growers, gourmet chefs, free thinkers, historic farm animals & poultry, Ozarkian crafters, trendy vendors & herbal hippies.

I don’t think I could describe it much better than that. It was really a unique event and something that, even after going to, I’m going to have a hard time writing about. I saw the dreaded-out Bob Marley wantabes, the Deep South rednecks, the make peace hippies, tons of people in western and 1800’s period clothing. I listened to one family band sing beautiful southern gospel music on one stage while “The Checkered Past” band sang about environmental responsibility and clashing political one-sidedness on another. We met a family of 24 kids, 19 of which had been adopted from countries all around the world and has had a book written about them. There were a lot of older retirees, which I expected, but there were several young families and even a few young couples, which I had not. Basically it was a whole slew of people who felt like us. Yes there were widely varying political and religious views but we feel that the mainstream, throwaway society is failing us and that there is a better way of doing things.

That night we camped in an open pasture nearby. Xander and Lorelei entertained themselves by sword fighting everything in sight (we had watched Hook on Friday) and making a friend with our 2-year old neighbor. That night we built a fire and chased fireflies (I did the chasing while everyone else thought I looked ridiculous) and we fell asleep to the sounds of crickets and frogs singing their song. It sounded just like a sound effect simulating the night that you might hear on TV or the radio. The following morning we awoke to our “cow alarm” in the field behind us and the birds having a festival of their own and we killed some time outside our tent by reading, collecting firewood, and generally running amuck. I felt a little redneck when we were sitting in our folding chairs in front of our tent brushing our teeth and spitting on what ever open ground we could find, until I realized that the neighbors on our left had chickens running around in their “yard” and the neighbors on our right had slept in their car. Good company I guess.

We went to the festival again that day and there were much fewer people there making it easier to get around and into shops. We were blessed with beautiful weather all weekend and we ended up with 8 basil, 2 tomatoes, and 4 pepper plants, all of the heirloom variety. Unfortunately we couldn’t leave with chickens, heirloom or otherwise. We had planned on staying the night there and camp again but we were just kind of bushed at midday and wanted to get going. So we packed up all of our gear and headed out. We got about as far as Conway, AK, just north of Little Rock and stopped for the night. The kids and Mrs. were ready for a rest so we did and then kept on this morning.

It was a very fun, educational, interesting, eye-opening, enlightening, quality vacation and not something we’ll soon forget. We’re pretty well exhausted at this point and all kind of sick of each other on some level or another but we'll think about going back to this or another festival of it's kind in the future.